The Problem With Ice Cream
by High Huntress Elinaria
Summary: So you destroyed our sofa, the priceless vase-thing from my deceased parents and left the empty boxes of our entire ice cream stock on the floor to look for a mobile phone? You're lying, Zel. One-Shot AU ZeLink, Zelda's PoV, fluff alert.


Hi again! Sorry it's been such a long time. I have been busy with exams and other such horrible things. But I'm back with another one-shot. I may revamp Happy Thoughts some time in the near future. I looked at it again and realised just how pathetically short it was...

Anyway, enjoy the cheese and sickeningly sweet fluff below.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own The Legend of Zelda. If I did, I wouldn't still be stuck with an evil Headmistress who thinks it's her duty to make us all as miserable as possible.

* * *

"Zelda? Zelda! Zelda Synesian, get your arse out here _now!_"

Oh crap. Not good.

"Why?"

"You know why! Now get out here and talk to me!"

I sighed. I was going to have to face him. I put down my pen, swivelled slowly on my wheelie chair, and, grudgingly, trudged toward the door. I opened it to a scene of chaos. My chaos. That I had left for my unsuspecting housemate to walk in on.

Link was standing in the middle of it, looking thoroughly disgruntled.

"What the hell happened, Zel?"

"Well… you see…" I trailed off, smiling sheepishly.

"Out with it, Zel. Now." His tone made me wince. I was in deep, deep poo.

"Well, you see, I got a bit carried away with the fact that my phone was missing, and so was looking for it in the sitting room…?" Oops. Definitely landed in horse manure there, Zellie. Try to look innocent.

"So you destroyed our sofa, the priceless vase-thing from my deceased parents, and left what looks like the empty boxes of our entire ice cream stock on the floor, simply to look for a mobile phone?"

He was actually fuming. I'd never seen him that mad. He still looked damn sexy, though.

"Uh huh…" You're digging your own grave, Zellie. Don't show that you're lying. _Don't_.

"You're lying, Zel." _Crap._

I can't exactly tell him that the reason his parents' priceless vase-thing is smashed, our sofa is shredded, and our entire ice-cream stock is working its way through my digestive system is him.

I can't tell him that I ate roughly four _thousand_ per cent of my GDA of sugar because he took Ruto to Café Telma.

I just _can't_.

"Zelda? Tell me. _Now_." His voice was very firm.

"Err…" I panicked slightly, desperately trying to think of something to say.

"Well?" He raised his eyebrows, an ever-so-faint smile on his lips.

Zellie, breathe. Zellie, you mustn't lose control and tell him. Zellie, do not let your tongue do what it wants.

"Well what?" I tried to stall for time.

"Why does our living space look like the moblins came and had a party in it?" His lips had lost all trace of a smile, and his eyes flashed dangerously.

Dear Nayru, he's sexy. No, come on, Zellie, focus!

"Sorry, Link, I think I left the shower on. I'll just go turn the water off."

Good thinking there, Zellie. Really _great. _Not.

He eyed me suspiciously. "Really?"

"Umm…yup. Gotta go now, bye!" I slammed my bedroom door in his face, locked it, and ran to my bathroom. I could hear him yelling.

"Zellie! Zelda! Zelda Synesian, don't think that just because you've locked the door you've escaped!"

What does that mean?

"I mean, I could always… knock the door down…"

Oh no, he wouldn't.

_Thud._

Oh yes, he would.

_Thud._

What do I do?!

_Thud._ The sound of wood splintering.

"I'm coming, I'm coming! Sheesh!" I rushed to the door, fumbled with the key, and pulled it open. Then, something… interesting… happened. Link, who had been running full pelt towards my door, ploughed straight through the open doorway, and crashed into me. I got knocked backwards, and felt a splitting pain in the back of my head, before everything went fuzzy, like it does when you've had too much to drink, and I collapsed on the floor.

The next thing I saw was Link's blurry face. The next thing I felt was the headache to end all headaches.

"Ow." I winced, blinking owlishly. Link let out a breath. It smelt of chocolate and vanilla. Of course, that was probably my concussion-addled brain making things up, but hey.

"I'm so sorry, Zel. I didn't mean to hit you, or knock you out, and I'm really, really-"

He was cut off by my finger on his lips. They were really soft. I wondered what it would be like to kiss them. _Focus, Zellie_.

"Schtum. Apology accepted. It was kind of my fault anyway with the whole locking the door thing." It was also kind of flattering the way he was so concerned about me…

"Yes. It was your fault, I guess. Now are you going to tell me why you destroyed the sitting room?"

…Or not. He just wanted to know what had me so ruffled.

"I can't tell you." I said, as I got up.

"Yes, you can." He was smiling wryly.

"No, I can't." I refused to look at him.

"Yes, you can." I felt his touch on my chin as he turned my head to face him.

Don't falter, Zellie. Focus on something other than the burning sensation flooding from his fingers. Don't tell him. Don't…

"It was 'cause you took Ruto to Café Telma."

_Shit._ Stupid mouth!

"And what's wrong with me taking Ruto to Café Telma?"

"Err… Nothing… It's just…"

"It's just what?" He looked smug. Stupid, _stupid_ mouth, and stupid, sexy Link! I clamped my mouth shut and didn't say anything, afraid of what I would say if my mouth had free reign.

"Would you talk to me if I told you that my date with Ruto was a complete disaster and there's no way that you could pay me to go out with her?"

Wait a minute. Did he just say what I think he said? He didn't… The date… It wasn't a success, and they're never going out again?!

I came to my senses, realised that my jaw had dropped a foot, and that Link was now standing two inches away from me, arms folded. I could feel heat radiating from him.

_Swoon._

I closed my mouth, swallowed and looked up.

"Well?" He was smirking. And Nayru damn him, he looked positively _gorgeous_.

There was only one thing I could do. I flung my arms around his neck, and kissed him full on the lips. When he didn't respond, I pulled away. Realisation reared its ugly head, and struck.

Oh goddesses, what had I done? He obviously didn't like me in that way, or he would have done something about it. Oh, crap, oh, crap, oh crap, oh crap, oh _crap!_

"Zelda, do you mind me saying that you are, possibly, the silliest person in Hyrule?"

Nayru, this _cannot_ be happening. I'm so stupid!

"You have been my roommate for three years, my best friend for over ten, and in all that time, you didn't twig that I faniced the pants off you?"

What?

"I mean, I knew Ruto was thick, but even she'd have realised earlier."

Now _that_ is too far.

"I am _not_ thicker than Ruto Lakeside. No _way._"

"Ha! Got you talking." He grinned. "No, you're not thicker than Ruto. It's just… I tried to make it obvious…"

"You could have told me! I mean, how much more obvious is tha-mmph!" I was cut off by his lips on mine, hard yet soft, demanding yet gentle, salty but sweeter than honey. And I, I regret to say, was a lump of mushy stuff on the floor. Din, Nayru and Farore, he was a good kisser!

Lack of oxygen forced us to part.

"One question, Link. Why did you take Ruto out on a date in the first place? And why didn't you tell me before?"

"That's two questions."

"Answer them both anyway."

"Fine. I shall do as you command, your Majesty." I hit him.

"Link!"

"Okay, okay. I went out with Ruto to prove to myself that I wasn't a complete moblin and that I was a bit attractive. And to get over you, I guess…" He shrugged, suddenly serious. "And as for why I didn't tell you before – well. It was never the right time, for one thing. For the other, I was convinced you fancied Ralph."

"Ralph? Why would I fancy Ralph?"

"I don't know. It just… seemed like it."

I looked at him with my eyebrows raised, arms folded over my chest.

"Seriously, Link? I remember beginning to fancy you back when we were children. I also remember that I never stopped loving you since."

And with that, I pulled his lips down to mine and kissed him again. We kissed for quite a while, actually.

Let's just say that it was very nice waking up next to him, and that our friends wondered why we were both so tired the next day.

* * *

Omigosh. Fluffity fluff fluff.

Anyway, peeps, make sure you hit the little purple button below and make me very happy. Even if you can't be bothered to give me an essay. One word'll do. Of course, if you want to give me an essay, that would be lovely.

Luffs and hugglies to all!

_xHHEx_


End file.
